MILE X

7: CAN WE WALK THE WHOLE RIM TRAIL INSTEAD

44: Um… that’s three miles and 500 feet of climbing.

7: MOM WE NEED TO

44: It would take us probably two hours.

7: WE’RE GOING TO CATCH A CHIT-MUNK

44 : Sure, go ahead and try!

7: WE WILL KEEP THE CHIT-MUNK

44: You have guinea pigs

7: WE WILL KEEP IT IN A CAGE IN OUR ROOM

44: How many donut holes can I fit in my purse

*
—Mile 0.5, 300 feet elevation gained—

7: CAN WE JUST GO HOME

44: No

*

—Mile 0.75, 350 feet of elevation gained—

7: HOW MUCH MOSS AM I ALLOWED TO TAKE WITH ME

44: You’re not

7: I PEELED IT UP ALREADY CAN YOU PUT IT IN YOUR PURSE

44: No

7: THEN WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO LIE ON IT FOR A WHILE

44: ok

*

—Mile 1, 400 feet of elevation gained—

44: That’s a hemlock. Look at the needles, all flat and sort of lacey.

7: PUT IT IN YOUR POCKET

44: ok. That’s called a specimen.

7: WILL YOU CARRY MY SHOES

44: No.

7: WHY AREN’T YOU HELPING US CATCH THE CHIT-MUNK

44: They’re too fast.

7: THIS IS THE MOST BORING DAY EVER

44: Walk around the puddles please.

*

—Mile 1.5, 500 feet of elevation gained—

7: MY SHOES ARE TOO MUDDY WILL YOU CARRY MY SHOES

44: No

7: I’M GETTING BACK PROBLEMS FROM CARRYING THESE HEAVY SHOES

44: That sounds serious

7: CAN I GET A FERN SPECIMEN

44: Yes

*

—Mile 1.75, top of trail—

44: I found a fern specimen—

7: THAT IS THE WRONG KIND OF FERN

44: Oh.

7: WHEN HE GETS HIS TOOTH SURGERY IS HE GOING TO STAY HOME FROM SCHOOL

44: Probably for a day, maybe two.

7: THAT IS NOT FAIR

44: The rule is that when you’re sick you stay home and when you’re not you go to school.

7: I’M NOT WALKING ANOTHER STEP

44: It’s fine to be mad but we don’t get split up in the woods.

7: THEN I WILL WALK AHEAD OF YOU MEAN HORRIBLE PEOPLE

*

—Mile 2, 200 feet of elevation lost—

7: MY TOOTH HURTS

44: I’m sorry, it was probably the donut holes

7: WHY DID YOU GIVE ME JUNK YOU SHOULDN’T GIVE ME JUNK

44: Maybe if you eat this Pirate’s Booty it will clear the sugar

7: YOU HAVE PIRATE’S BOOTY FOR HIM AND NOT FOR ME??

44: I had popcorn for you and you already ate it

7: THAT’S NOT FAIR

44: I have this orange

7: I DON’T WANT AN ORANGE

*

—Mile 2.5, 300 feet of elevation lost—

7: THIS IS THE WORST DAY EVER

44: You’ve almost made it 3 miles! You’re like professional hikers!

7: CAN WE BRING THIS PYRAMID SHAPED ROCK WITH US

44: That’s a twenty pound rock

7: PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE

—Mile 3, trail complete—

7: HERE’S THE THING IS WE’RE GOING TO NEED SEPARATE TVS WHEN WE GET HOME

44: Dinner first then TV

7: THAT’S NOT FAIR

44: You can tell your teachers tomorrow that you did the whole rim trail!

7: WENDELL MAKES FUN OF MY ROTTEN TEETH I’M GOING TO FEED HIM SUGAR FOR BREAKFAST LUNCH AND DINNER

*

—Home, bedtime—

7: CAN WE DO THE RIM TRAIL AGAIN TOMORROW?