ACT I
CARDIOLOGIST: You should see a pulmonologist.
PULMONOLOGIST: You should see a rheumatologist.
RHEUMATOLOGIST: You should see a pulmonologist.
PULMONOLOGIST: Your lungs are great.
ME: You sure?
PULMONOLOGIST: Yep. Better than good. Great. Awesome. Better talk to your rheumatologist.
ACT II:
RHEUMATOLOGIST: Your numbers are perfect. I’m not a lung specialist and that’s what we need— specific, pulmonary insight. Try a new pulmonologist.
PULMONOLOGIST IN DIFFERENT CITY: If your rheumatologist thinks we can solve this for you, he’s (implied, point-to-the-ear-and-make-cuckoo-clock-circles). You’d better see one of OUR rheumatologists here in THIS city. SHE’S experienced and super awesome.
RHEUMATOLOGIST IN DIFFERENT CITY: I agree with your rheumatologist in the first city.
ACT III