Notes from the Dishwasher Café
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PATCHY-ASS LIFE
For a minute, it was a normal morning. Two five-year-olds woke, each a shade of angry and disgruntled. They bashed their way down the stairs and stomped…
Apr 18
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Caroline Manring
2
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PATCHY-ASS LIFE
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AT THIS POINT WHY NOT
My husband: “Can you make some pasta for our two children while I finish this eighteen-course Mediterranean meal for our ninety-six guests?” Me: “Yes…
Apr 11
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Caroline Manring
8
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AT THIS POINT WHY NOT
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GOOD MORNING HONEY WHO ARE WE TODAY
an exploration of selves with an excess of photographic evidence
Apr 4
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Caroline Manring
5
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GOOD MORNING HONEY WHO ARE WE TODAY
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March 2024
ONE STAR REVIEW
It is 6:06am. I’ve just been yelled at for the sixth time since bedtime last night for suggesting that my child, who has a fever of 104F and is sitting…
Mar 28
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Caroline Manring
5
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ONE STAR REVIEW
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SEND IN THE CLOWNS
My choices tend towards the screwy. Why not, for example—during a brief and intense era of squinting and straining to SEE ANYTHING AT ALL, when the most…
Mar 21
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Caroline Manring
4
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SEND IN THE CLOWNS
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SAMANTHA
where proper metaphors fear to tread
Mar 14
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Caroline Manring
5
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SAMANTHA
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HAIL WEIRDO WELL MET
Yesterday something strange happened. One minute I was grumping around about the espresso machine (how it has become more of a tired, leaky urinary…
Mar 7
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Caroline Manring
9
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HAIL WEIRDO WELL MET
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February 2024
MANUALLY
I feel for several reasons that a review of certain sections of the Manual would be pertinent at this juncture. 118.3.4 IF a Household Adult re-stacks…
Feb 29
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Caroline Manring
3
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MANUALLY
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14
NOT FUNNY
Dear readers: Sometimes I am not funny. Most of the time I am not funny. I am often sufficiently earnest to assess a pot of strawberry jam as “more goop…
Feb 22
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Caroline Manring
8
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NOT FUNNY
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SHOW YOURSELF
Something disturbing happened, I admit to my husband. He does not look up from his espresso grinding, for he is very, very used to me. I take a breath…
Feb 15
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Caroline Manring
7
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SHOW YOURSELF
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THE SCHOOL FOR WEARISOME JELLYFISH
I come from a family institution in which birthdays were celebrated on a single day, with a cake and surprise presents and guests. Enter my husband…
Feb 8
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Caroline Manring
10
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THE SCHOOL FOR WEARISOME JELLYFISH
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IEP
When it comes to Honoring the Light in Everyone, I’m caught somewhere between “let’s make flower crowns” and “Mr. Brocklehurst during the typhus…
Feb 1
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Caroline Manring
5
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IEP
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